Acceptance, Attitude, Awkward, Brat, Captain Obvious, cats, Cleanliness, Coffee, Control, Crap!, Cups, Daily, Empty, Habits, Humor, Idiosyncrasy, Kitten, Learning, lid, Life, Love, Me, Mess, My bad!, Pets, Play nice, Quirk, Sneaky, Spill, Tradition!, Warmth, Wow

6-14-19 Coffee & Cats (a humorous look at my mornings).

Coffee and cats

Who is to say

How these cats know

What’s in my cup each day.

But they do

Or at least they must

Because when my cup is set down,

It’s secret is a bust.

I keep my cup covered

To help in case of a spill

That is inevitable

With a swipe and a grin.

I swear my cats grin

When they swipe at my cup

The dogs wait under the edge

Of the table looking up

I think that they

are in cahoots

The cats swipe

The dogs lick

Nothing is sacred

From the juice they pick.

So I actually got a sign

From my husband

That says

“Do not leave food unsupervised!”

Because of the cats

My cups of coffee

And the puddle that lies

(On the floor.)

Acceptance, Agree to disagree, Angels, Attitude, Autoimmune diseases, Awkward, Bills, bills, bills, Cleanliness, Coke, Control, Cost, Crap!, Cry, Death, Diets, Education, Empty, Fate, Food, Future, Glass, Glimmer, Growth, Hashimotos, Hat, Hypothyroidism, Idiosyncrasy, Judge & Jury, Kitten, Learning, Life, Love, Magic, Manager, Me, Mess, Minimal, MiniMart, Mirrors, Moving On, My bad!, Nap, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Overheated, Paid, Paranoid?, Parents, Past, Pets, Play nice, Playlist, Present, Respect, Scorpio, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Snow, Socks, Soul, Sun, Sunrises, Sunsets, Superstition, Sweat 💦, Teaching, Tears 😭, Tradition!, Trees, Two Sides, Unconditional, Veterinarian, Warmth, Wow, Writing

Play It Backwards

You know that old joke about Country Music? The one that goes “What happens when you play a Country song backwards? He gets his job back. He gets his truck back. He gets his dog back. Oh! Annnddd, he gets a contract for his songs!” Ha! Ha! Ha! Everyone laughs.

Cue tacky twang, I’ve got a good one.

(Given that it’s Christmas Eve I’ll see what Andy Williams has going on.)

Ahem.

It’s the worst, awfulest time of the year!

With the kids snowmobiling,

And everyone telling you,

“Watch out for deeeeeeeeer!”

It’s the worst, awfulest time of the year!

~

It’s the sa- saddest season of all.

With those doctor appointment calls,

And tons of blood work

Without real answers at alllllll

It’s the sa-saddest season of all.

~

There were dreams we were living,

Pugs and pets we were loving

Money for spending

on travels for stories of glories

With projects we’re working onnnnnn

~

2017 had us jumping and begging

The vet bill was crazy

My baby girl pug passed away

My dream career (not just a job) is done

Student loans are threatening

SSA-Disability is on government vacation

My eye glasses broke on a holiday weekend.

It the worst, worst 2017 of all.

Well? Is this properly pouty and pessimistic?

The thing is, I can’t cry anymore. I am So. Far. Gone. it’s pathetic! I have to laugh at each “problem” when it pops up. This makes me look crazy. And that is ok.

I still think that if everyone in the world was given a puppy and a Coke, we could sing a song and hold hands with whomever we choose and the world would be a happy place.

Or, maybe I just need a day of The Hallmark Channel with feel good shows and movies. 😬. “Jesus, take the wheel”.

Acceptance, Agree to disagree, Attitude, Autoimmune diseases, Awkward, Bare, Books, Captain Obvious, Car, Click, College, Control, Cost, Crap!, Cry, Cups, Death, Diets, Education, Empty, Fate, Food, Future, Gas Card, Glass, Glimmer, Growth, Hashimotos, Husband, Hypothyroidism, Idiosyncrasy, Judge & Jury, Learning, Life, Life changes, Light, Logic, Love, Magic, Magnifying, Manager, Marriage, Me, Medicinal Metaphor, Mess, Mirrors, Mom, Moon, Morel mushrooms, Moving On, My bad!, Nap, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Overheated, Paid, Paranoid?, Parents, Past, Pets, Play nice, Playlist, Present, Quirk, Rationale, Relentless, Respect, Scorpio, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Sneaky, Snow, Socks, Soul, Sun, Sunrises, Sunsets, Superstition, Sweat 💦, Teaching, Tears 😭, Telepathy, Tradition!, Two Sides, Unconditional, Warmth, Wow, Writing

Two Big No’s

The Search:

Given my current situation, I decided to try to find a Physician who is informed, specialized in, and was challenge worthy of curing what ails me. I have been filling out forms galore! I went through one entire Health Park and one Internal Medicine Hospital.

Let’s see, I have traveled all over my state in the USA. The money for fuel, hotels, dinner, co-pays, prescriptions, job loss and overall mental stress is not what I am upset about. That’s just collateral damage. One’s Health is priceless. So I pushed from one end to the other of specialists, general, and …

Well, you name it, I was there. Husband in hand. Mother as a barracuda. Even a very close friend from work -all to be my “Rock”. I am always thankful to them. ❤️

What?

My research is self-sustaining (when I don’t have brain fog, or a headache, or simply exhausted). It is also self-torture. I have gone through Social Media, Libraries and Journals.

I know a lot about Hypothyroidism. Throw some Auto Immune Disease in there too. Oops, don’t forget the Hashimoto’s Disease, Migraines, Hormonal Imbalances, Anxiety, Depression, Hopelessness, PTSD, Seizures, Food Intolerances, hair loss, Vertigo and Concussions due to falling. have had all of these symptoms/experiences in the past four years. This past year January 1, 2016 through today my “experiences” have become a million

times worse than when all of this started.

Kinda Cool Part<<<<<
ed that blood tests are not really necessary in my case, because they don’t test the cells which make up the body. The cells which make us human don’t get tested. Blood does. Thus getting a normal lab result is counter-intuitive to discovering the cause of my woes.

Declined<<<<<
, I was declined by both attempts of becoming a patient of an Internal Medicine Hospital as well as the ENTIRE Health Park. Hmmmm. As Shakespeare would say, “Much Ado About Nothing”.

Now What?<<<<<
paign called “The Broken Brain” by Dr. Hyman. I watched the trailer, then I signed up for the free online Docu-series. There are eight episodes and over fifty doctors who attest to the information presented:

“With 1.1 BILLION lives compromised by brain issues EVERY day, I know this documentary series will provide vital new information, expert connections and most of all, hope.”

Fees<<<
e wellness center in MA. They don’t accept insurance. They charge approximately $10,000.00 for their two days of service.

The similar wellness clinic in my state (as there are many centers across the country) also does not take insurance either.

Rock Robbins<<<<<
o an article I read this evening, those involved were exasperated and out of money. You should read it. Alas, they have hope!

I like how the author states “When one doctor or specialist had tried everything in his or her repertoire, we’d move on to someone else.After enough traditional doctors couldn’t dial her health in, we eventually moved on to alternative doctors and treatments – chiropractic, acupuncture, herbal supplements, meditation, and on and on…”That’s (This is) the reality (body image, weight gain) for some women. With multiple issues and body systems affecting each other and playing off each other, it can be pretty challenging to get everything into balance.blockquote>We found that this condition involved so much more than just physiology. So many elements played into this diagnosis – it was about stress, food, lifestyle, belief systems, relationships and more.We have spent the last 20 years, and almost $300,000, diving deep into this dis-ease. <<<<<<<<<
ut my future, as well as my husband and family’s future. Watch the attached video shared from YouTube. It’s thought provoking. I may not have a cure or a new place to dig in and research, but I have hope (kinda, sorta, maybe; depends on the day).

Broken Brain Dr. Hyman

26 letters, Acceptance, Agree to disagree, Attitude, Awkward, Bare, Brat, Captain Obvious, Car, Cheetos, Cleanliness, Click, Coke, College, Come to Jesus, Control, Cost, Crap!, Cups, Diets, Education, Empty, Fate, Food, Future, Gas Card, Glass, Glimmer, Growth, Hat, Hot! Hot! Hot!, Husband, Idiosyncrasy, Judge & Jury, Learning, Life, Life changes, Light, Literary Devices, Logic, Long Distance, Love, Magic, Magnifying, Manager, Marriage, Me, Mess, Minimal, MiniMart, Mirrors, Moving On, Noise Canceling Headphones, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Overheated, Paid, Paranoid?, Parents, Past, Pepsi, Perfect Pair of Jeans, Pets, Play nice, Playlist, Present, Purses, Quirk, Rationale, Relentless, Respect, SALE /not sale, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Sneaky, Socks, Sun, Sunflower seeds, Sunrises, Sunsets, Superstition, Sweat 💦, Tradition!, Two Sides, Type A, Type B, Unconditional, Warmth, White, Windows, Wow, Writing

135 Yesterday, 95 Today

Emails.

Yep, that’s right.  My email address is getting way too many messages.  Anyone else in this boat?

I’m not putting this out there for bragging about or fishing for compliments.  I’m putting this out there because I am not going to read them all.  Any coupons, weekly ads, going out of sale ads, or relisting of items that I was outbid on previously are going to my trash and junk.

—-UPDATE—- 112 Emails as of 1:43 pm —-


I prefer emails from family or friends.  There, I said it.  The biggest offenders in my inbox are WalMart and GFS.  Hint*. There’s only two of us and we are not interested in 5 gallons of potato salad, nor products for infants.  I know, I know, I am not the only person they send ads and emails too.  But they can take me off of their lists, for like, ever-ish.  (That’s a word… ever-ish.  I add ish to a lot of words now.  Given that American English is a living language I can make up all kinds of words -if I wanted to; alas I shall stick with ish words for the time being.)

ANYWAY

Which brings me to my main objective in this rant…  if brick and mortar stores and  webstores are insisting on emailing me, I would at the very least want the information to relate to either me or my husband.  I know that there are algorithms that exist for this very purpose.  They’re imbedded in those fun, little, member cards.

Again, don’t get me wrong… if you are a real, human, family member or friend, I promise not to put your communications in Junk.  It’s bad enough that I refuse to answer my phones anymore because of the crazy spamming going on.


Honestly I am not sure about which is worse…🤔. The phone ringing incessantly or my inbox stretching itself out so much.  

It’s obvious to consumer’s that sellers are desperately trying to communicate with us all.  Did they all invest in the Nigerian Prince with a great opportunity?  (Haha). 

ATTENTION SPAMMERS:  

  • I know that I did not register for a trip to Bermuda, Florida, London or Paris.  
  • I also know that I do not have a Windows based computer which needs an unsolicited computer tech.
  • I am aware that my credit card is doing just fine.  So you must be making the error on your end.
  • I know that my vehicle is not under warranty and that I can purchase a new warranty or vehicle which comes with a brand new warranty.
  • I am not a fax machine.
  • The Nigerian Prince is NOT Raj from The Big Bang Theory; and neither exist in reality.  (Bummer.  I like the character traits of Rajesh Kuthrapoli)

Oh the list is endless at this point…  Sadly so is my patience.  So I shall leave you with these parting words of wisdom.

Ready?

WORDS OF WISDOM BY ME:

  • Any word ending with “ish”.
  • No.
  • No thank you.
  • Delete.
  • Unsubscribe.
  • Trash.
  • Just let the machine get it.”


"The Ron Y Chromosome Nothing Box", 26 letters, Acceptance, Agree to disagree, Air Conditioner, Alice Hoffman, Angels, Another Difranco, Attitude, Autoimmune diseases, Awkward, Bai, Bare, Baseball, Beach Glass, Bills, bills, bills, Black, Books, Brat, Calculating, Candy, Captain Obvious, Car, Cheetos, Cleanliness, Click, Coke, College, Come to Jesus, Control, Cost, Crap!, Cry, Cups, Darwinist, Dean Koontz, Death, Diets, Education, Empty, Fate, Food, Football 🏈, Fur-ever, Future, Galileo, Gas Card, Gene Wilder, George Carlin, Glass, Glimmer, Growth, Guns, Hashimotos, Hat, Hot! Hot! Hot!, Husband, Hypothyroidism, I miss him, Idiosyncrasy, Judge & Jury, Kitten, Learning, Libra, Life, Life changes, Light, Lion, Literary Devices, Logic, Long Distance, Love, Magic, Magnifying, Manager, Marriage, Me, Medicinal Metaphor, Mess, Minimal, MiniMart, Mirrors, Mocha, Mom, Moon, Morel mushrooms, Moving On, Mutt, My bad!, Nap, NASCAR 🏎, Naturalist, Noise Canceling Headphones, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Overheated, Paid, Paranoid?, Parents, Past, Pepsi, Perfect Pair of Jeans, Pets, Pinkdom, Play nice, Playlist, Present, Purses, Quirk, Rationale, Relentless, Respect, Robin Williams, Room 406, Rose, SALE /not sale, Scorpio, Scott Stabille, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Sisters, Skeleton, Skull, Snapple, Sneaky, Snow, Socks, Soul, Sun, Sunflower seeds, Sunrises, Sunsets, Superstition, Sweat 💦, Teaching, Tears 😭, Telepathy, Tradition!, Trees, Two Sides, Type A, Type B, Uncategorized, Unconditional, Veterinarian, Warmth, White, Windows, Wow, Writing

When?

How do you explain 

     Butterflies in your tummy?

Or how you just know 

     That it’s all going to be ok?

How do you accept an unexpected 

     loss which shatters your soul?

Why didn’t you know?

—–

Acceptance, Attitude, Autoimmune diseases, Awkward, Bare, Black, Books, Brat, Calculating, Captain Obvious, Cleanliness, Control, Crap!, Cry, Darwinist, Diets, Education, Empty, Fate, Food, Fur-ever, Future, Galileo, Growth, Hashimotos, Hypothyroidism, Idiosyncrasy, Judge & Jury, Learning, Life, Life changes, Light, Literary Devices, Logic, Love, Magic, Magnifying, Manager, Me, Mess, Minimal, Mirrors, Moving On, My bad!, Nap, Naturalist, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Paranoid?, Past, Pets, Play nice, Present, Quirk, Rationale, Relentless, Respect, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Soul, Tears 😭, Two Sides, Warmth, White, Windows, Wow, Writing

Be Gentle With Yourself.

The title of this post references one of my favorite pieces of writing, The Desiderata.  No one can confirm or deny the author and date of publication, but I don’t think that I would have it differently regardless of those details.  

I have not heeded it’s simple words.  

I am not gentle with myself.  I am cruel, degrading and relentless in my mind to myself.   

~~~~~

True story:  I received a compliment from a retail worker.  (She claims that I always wear the cutest tops.). I was in a gourmet cupcake shoppe.  I smiled at her, thanked her, and then in the same tone of voice -calm, quiet, sweet, and said “I hate myself actually, mostly my body.  I shop for tops all of the time.  My arms are the worst.  So I try to only get 3/4 length sleeves… 

It took a few more moments of drivel before I noticed her again.  I had gone inside myself and starting pointing to various areas of imperfection; kind of like a flight attendant pointing out emergency exits.  

Back to reality.  She was still there and I was honestly surprised that she hadn’t moved on to another customer.  I didn’t say all of that to garner an unearned second compliment.  Which is good because I think she was too surprised with my response, she didn’t know what to say.  I smiled, lowered my head to acknowledge that days’ blouse.  

I apologized for the commentary and reached for my cupcake.  Which, by the way, I had lost interest in.  It was only going to make things worse.  

(Why is this blue?)

~~~~~

See what I mean about failing to be gentle with myself?    I’m pretty sure that I had offended her and quickly added that to my self degradation list.  (Loser, quit offending nice people).

I don’t have some awful sin to atone.  I just said what I was thinking and am always thinking.  I have to be more careful in the future with this type of situation.  I would rather fix my response than use that energy on accepting myself.  Oh the irony.

Does everyone else do this too?  You know, hate themselves 24/7?  Is there a brain cell that allows this?  Is it a depression thing?  How about female?  Maybe a need for perfection sets me off.

~~~~~~~~

Today I was trying to laminate a card with packaging tape so that I could hang it up somewhere…  I wanted it to be in it’s original state for as long as possible.  But the stupid tape wasn’t very cooperative.   Here I am, trying to get control of the tape and it sticks to the card all weird.  Bubbles, creases, imperfect lines which show overlapping.  I could just kick myself.  The oh-so precious card wasn’t perfect anymore.  I had screwed that up too.  Upon closer inspection I noticed that there is black dog hair stuck too.  Check it out…

Perfect -Ha!

Curious about the front of the card?  I mean, it mattered so much that I was trying to preserve it…

My favorite part 🎀

See?  I told you I messed it up.  Again with irony.  (*sigh)

Creases and tears in the tape.  It will never be perfect now.  Which is okay -for a card, right?

I love her!
Black Pug -fur shedder.


Acceptance, Angels, Attitude, Autoimmune diseases, Awkward, Bills, bills, bills, Books, Calculating, Candy, Captain Obvious, Car, Cheetos, Cleanliness, Click, Coke, College, Control, Cost, Crap!, Cry, Cups, Empty, Fate, Food, Fur-ever, Glass, Glimmer, Growth, Hashimotos, Husband, Hypothyroidism, Judge & Jury, Learning, Life, Life changes, Light, Logic, Long Distance, Love, Magic, Magnifying, Manager, Marriage, Me, Medicinal Metaphor, Mess, Minimal, MiniMart, Mirrors, Mocha, Moon, Morel mushrooms, Moving On, Mutt, My bad!, Nap, NASCAR 🏎, Naturalist, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Paid, Paranoid?, Parents, Past, Pepsi, Perfect Pair of Jeans, Pets, Pinkdom, Play nice, Playlist, Present, Purses, Quirk, Rationale, Relentless, Respect, Robin Williams, Rose, SALE /not sale, Scorpio, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Sisters, Skeleton, Skull, Snapple, Sneaky, Socks, Soul, Sun, Sunflower seeds, Sunrises, Sunsets, Superstition, Sweat 💦, Telepathy, Tradition!, Trees, Two Sides, Warmth, Windows, Wow, Writing

🕶 Summer 2017 👒

The skies are blue with white clouds, the wind is in the tops of the trees, and the scent of freshly mowed grass floats through the air.


I can be found outside to absorb Vitamin D more often.  I often go for drives in my 1999 Mazda Miata (top down, radio up.) singing my heart out.  I can enjoy the scenery when I take my dogs on walks.  I could go for bike rides with my husband.  I could follow through with plans or have a summer job for extra money.  But I’m not doing any of these things.  I can hope that all of this will play out next summer or the summer after that.  I will be ok, just not today.


I am spending this summer filling out forms.  Forms?  Yes, forms.  Being in my condition, I have a lot to “prove” to people, I guess.  I have forms for Student Loans, Social Security, Insurance Companies, Appointments to keep from each groups’ Independent Medical Reviews.  My years worth of forms is not helping to remove my carbon footprint.

So if you get the chance to capture some Vitamin D, walk your dog, drive your convertible and go for bike/ horse rides, do it.   Do it for everyone who can’t, right now.  Enjoy the outside and stay “form-free”.  Don’t pick up a writing utensil or hide behind a screen of any sort.  Mind your manners.  Eat full-fat ice cream … on a WAFFLE CONE! 

Most of all… 

Enjoy the Summer of 2017. 👒