Acceptance, Agree to disagree, Angels, Attitude, Awkward, Bare, Books, Brat, Calculating, Captain Obvious, Click, College, Control, Cost, Cry, Education, Future, Galileo, Growth, Guns, Idiosyncrasy, Judge & Jury, Learning, Life, Life changes, Light, Literary Devices, Logic, Long Distance, Love, Magnifying, Manager, Mess, Minimal, Moving On, Not worth the headache, Organized, Paid, Paranoid?, Parents, Pinkdom, Play nice, Present, Quirk, Rationale, Relentless, Respect, Room 406, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Soul, Teaching, Tears 😭, Telepathy, Tradition!, Two Sides, Unconditional, Warmth, Windows, Wow, Writing

It’s Tough

It’s tough to watch

And I wonder

“What’s next”?

The USA Education

is a bust today.

But, can everyone

say “I did my best”?

~~~~

We know about

the original policies,

And we see the one

room school houses

The latest policies

and real academics

have no place

and have since eased,

We teach to

Standardized Tests,📝

bubbles,

number 2 pencils✏️

and a bunch of

changing rules.✅

~~~~

Teachers and staff

are forbidden

to discipline,

And yet, parents

want/ need someone to blame.

All of this is tiresome

and gets under my skin,

My mind can only see

the Federally banned novel📚

by Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451 (‘s)

🔥flame.🔥

~~~~

It’s not the guns,🔫

drugs💊

or violent games,🕹

It’s the kids📰

always pushing the limits

and the relentless

childish arguing🗯

for their rights

which means

calling the

“adults'” bluff.

~~~~

Therefore, empty threats,

the toys,

the distinction

and the fears

of what a child may claim

to law enforcement

and be separated

for years and years.

We all need to stand up,

learn the word “No“,

mean it,

have powerful support⚙️

and scream “Enough!”

~~~~

The USA Dept. of Education

needs a major

makeover,

Artificial Intelligence (A.I.),

Technology,

Wireless,

software,

hardware

,

upgrades

and cell…

~~~~~

However, staying out of touch,

ignoring the confrontation,

being politically correct,

loses the purpose

of the brick & mortar,

Community, safe place.

All of this

Really puts today’s students

into a decision:

real life vs. hell?

~~~~

I am aghast

at the thought

of arming school staff,

We have classes of 40+ students now.

All hyped up on sugar

and shots of caf (feine)…

I was brought up

in a different time.

Now it’s too easy to get lost

& feel contempt,

toward those who take

the class down.

This is NOT

what I went to college for.

~~~~

So this retired

Kindergarten, Grades 7-12 Teacher

implores,

With the U.S. Dept. of Education

to stop putting the future

in our past,

It doesn’t belong there.

This and those

future generations

will only

go elsewhere.

Oh!!,

And remember

that one kid

who got lost

and allowed the hate

to last?

~~~~

Won’t accept any blame.

Because it’s tough out there.

The attention and fame,

Are all sudden,

impulsive,

and wonderously

rare.

~~~~

Fifteen minutes of fame

taste oh-so-sweet.

The media’s view above

and below

cannot be beat.

The echoes of Sirens will

sound up and down

the streets.

The past

and future

finally meet.

⚡️👩🏼‍💻👨🏻‍💻 🌎🧝🏼‍♀️🧝🏽‍♂️⚡️🤼‍♂️🗽       🏰⚔️⚖️ 

Acceptance, Agree to disagree, Attitude, Autoimmune diseases, Awkward, Bare, Books, Captain Obvious, Car, Click, College, Control, Cost, Crap!, Cry, Cups, Death, Diets, Education, Empty, Fate, Food, Future, Gas Card, Glass, Glimmer, Growth, Hashimotos, Husband, Hypothyroidism, Idiosyncrasy, Judge & Jury, Learning, Life, Life changes, Light, Logic, Love, Magic, Magnifying, Manager, Marriage, Me, Medicinal Metaphor, Mess, Mirrors, Mom, Moon, Morel mushrooms, Moving On, My bad!, Nap, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Overheated, Paid, Paranoid?, Parents, Past, Pets, Play nice, Playlist, Present, Quirk, Rationale, Relentless, Respect, Scorpio, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Sneaky, Snow, Socks, Soul, Sun, Sunrises, Sunsets, Superstition, Sweat 💦, Teaching, Tears 😭, Telepathy, Tradition!, Two Sides, Unconditional, Warmth, Wow, Writing

Two Big No’s

The Search:

Given my current situation, I decided to try to find a Physician who is informed, specialized in, and was challenge worthy of curing what ails me. I have been filling out forms galore! I went through one entire Health Park and one Internal Medicine Hospital.

Let’s see, I have traveled all over my state in the USA. The money for fuel, hotels, dinner, co-pays, prescriptions, job loss and overall mental stress is not what I am upset about. That’s just collateral damage. One’s Health is priceless. So I pushed from one end to the other of specialists, general, and …

Well, you name it, I was there. Husband in hand. Mother as a barracuda. Even a very close friend from work -all to be my “Rock”. I am always thankful to them. ❤️

What?

My research is self-sustaining (when I don’t have brain fog, or a headache, or simply exhausted). It is also self-torture. I have gone through Social Media, Libraries and Journals.

I know a lot about Hypothyroidism. Throw some Auto Immune Disease in there too. Oops, don’t forget the Hashimoto’s Disease, Migraines, Hormonal Imbalances, Anxiety, Depression, Hopelessness, PTSD, Seizures, Food Intolerances, hair loss, Vertigo and Concussions due to falling. have had all of these symptoms/experiences in the past four years. This past year January 1, 2016 through today my “experiences” have become a million

times worse than when all of this started.

Kinda Cool Part<<<<<
ed that blood tests are not really necessary in my case, because they don’t test the cells which make up the body. The cells which make us human don’t get tested. Blood does. Thus getting a normal lab result is counter-intuitive to discovering the cause of my woes.

Declined<<<<<
, I was declined by both attempts of becoming a patient of an Internal Medicine Hospital as well as the ENTIRE Health Park. Hmmmm. As Shakespeare would say, “Much Ado About Nothing”.

Now What?<<<<<
paign called “The Broken Brain” by Dr. Hyman. I watched the trailer, then I signed up for the free online Docu-series. There are eight episodes and over fifty doctors who attest to the information presented:

“With 1.1 BILLION lives compromised by brain issues EVERY day, I know this documentary series will provide vital new information, expert connections and most of all, hope.”

Fees<<<
e wellness center in MA. They don’t accept insurance. They charge approximately $10,000.00 for their two days of service.

The similar wellness clinic in my state (as there are many centers across the country) also does not take insurance either.

Rock Robbins<<<<<
o an article I read this evening, those involved were exasperated and out of money. You should read it. Alas, they have hope!

I like how the author states “When one doctor or specialist had tried everything in his or her repertoire, we’d move on to someone else.After enough traditional doctors couldn’t dial her health in, we eventually moved on to alternative doctors and treatments – chiropractic, acupuncture, herbal supplements, meditation, and on and on…”That’s (This is) the reality (body image, weight gain) for some women. With multiple issues and body systems affecting each other and playing off each other, it can be pretty challenging to get everything into balance.blockquote>We found that this condition involved so much more than just physiology. So many elements played into this diagnosis – it was about stress, food, lifestyle, belief systems, relationships and more.We have spent the last 20 years, and almost $300,000, diving deep into this dis-ease. <<<<<<<<<
ut my future, as well as my husband and family’s future. Watch the attached video shared from YouTube. It’s thought provoking. I may not have a cure or a new place to dig in and research, but I have hope (kinda, sorta, maybe; depends on the day).

Broken Brain Dr. Hyman

"The Ron Y Chromosome Nothing Box", 26 letters, Acceptance, Agree to disagree, Air Conditioner, Alice Hoffman, Angels, Another Difranco, Attitude, Autoimmune diseases, Awkward, Bai, Bare, Baseball, Beach Glass, Bills, bills, bills, Black, Books, Brat, Calculating, Candy, Captain Obvious, Car, Cheetos, Cleanliness, Click, Coke, College, Come to Jesus, Control, Cost, Crap!, Cry, Cups, Darwinist, Dean Koontz, Death, Diets, Education, Empty, Fate, Food, Football 🏈, Fur-ever, Future, Galileo, Gas Card, Gene Wilder, George Carlin, Glass, Glimmer, Growth, Guns, Hashimotos, Hat, Hot! Hot! Hot!, Husband, Hypothyroidism, I miss him, Idiosyncrasy, Judge & Jury, Kitten, Learning, Libra, Life, Life changes, Light, Lion, Literary Devices, Logic, Long Distance, Love, Magic, Magnifying, Manager, Marriage, Me, Medicinal Metaphor, Mess, Minimal, MiniMart, Mirrors, Mocha, Mom, Moon, Morel mushrooms, Moving On, Mutt, My bad!, Nap, NASCAR 🏎, Naturalist, Noise Canceling Headphones, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Overheated, Paid, Paranoid?, Parents, Past, Pepsi, Perfect Pair of Jeans, Pets, Pinkdom, Play nice, Playlist, Present, Purses, Quirk, Rationale, Relentless, Respect, Robin Williams, Room 406, Rose, SALE /not sale, Scorpio, Scott Stabille, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Sisters, Skeleton, Skull, Snapple, Sneaky, Snow, Socks, Soul, Sun, Sunflower seeds, Sunrises, Sunsets, Superstition, Sweat 💦, Teaching, Tears 😭, Telepathy, Tradition!, Trees, Two Sides, Type A, Type B, Uncategorized, Unconditional, Veterinarian, Warmth, White, Windows, Wow, Writing

When?

How do you explain 

     Butterflies in your tummy?

Or how you just know 

     That it’s all going to be ok?

How do you accept an unexpected 

     loss which shatters your soul?

Why didn’t you know?

—–

26 letters, Acceptance, Agree to disagree, Air Conditioner, Attitude, Awkward, Books, Brat, Candy, Captain Obvious, Car, Cheetos, Cleanliness, Control, Cost, Crap!, Education, Empty, Fate, Food, Future, Galileo, Gas Card, Glass, Glimmer, Growth, Hat, Hot! Hot! Hot!, Husband, Hypothyroidism, Idiosyncrasy, Learning, Life, Life changes, Light, Logic, Love, Magic, Magnifying, Marriage, Me, Mess, Minimal, MiniMart, Moon, Moving On, My bad!, Nap, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Overheated, Paid, Past, Play nice, Playlist, Present, Purses, Quirk, Rationale, Respect, Senses, Silence, Socks, Soul, Sun, Sunrises, Sunsets, Sweat 💦, Telepathy, Tradition!, Two Sides, Unconditional, Warmth, Windows, Wow, Writing

What I learned this past week… 

Every once in awhile I think it’s important to share my lessons learned with anyone who wants to save themselves from actually having to figure these things out on their own.  It’s the end of July and I am fried.  (July 24th – 30th 2017).

Allow me to explain.

Contrary to popular belief, North East Michigan has “Summer” like everywhere else.  Sometimes it is just a temperature thing.  Other times the humidity kicks in with the high temperatures.  And naturally there are days of lower temperatures and high humidity.    This past week was the perfect storm of high temperatures plus humidity.  For me, this means ‘stay inside with the air conditioner’.


I am heat sensitive.  I get nauseous and zapped of any energy I might have had prior to stepping outside.  This situation will eventually become a Migraine.  But that’s nothing new.   I just wanted to offer some background information for you.

So, I already said it was mostly miserable outside (all week).  My attempts to find some respite were genuine…

For example:

Sunglasses

 When in the vehicle I wore dark sunglasses 😎.  However, it is important to remove the sunglasses when going inside a bank.  Talk about awkward.  Everyone gets all quiet and tense -especially if it’s not a branch you regularly use.  I swear I do not have any connection to the unabomber.  I just have a headache. 

~~~~~~~~
Gas Stations 

Next, I have found that grocery shopping and really any kind of shopping can be done in gas stations.  (Although all gas stations are not created equal.  The good one’s are out there!)  You can get lottery tickets, cappuccino, hoodies, chips, sandwiches, booze, home decor and jewelry all in one place.  So if you have forgotten something-like deodorant or phone charging cables, stop by the gas station with a store.  You will be pleasantly surprised. 






~~~~~~~~

 Sustenance

My husband and I have decided that driving while eating is a mess just waiting to happen.  So when we were en route to the various appointments this past week, we would choose a place with a dining area.  We have also determined that fast food meals cost as much as restaurant meals.  Therefore we usually aim for ‘real’ food establishments.  (I don’t want to get in trouble for last epiphany, you know what I mean.). If I order a chicken sandwich, I want to be able to recognize the chicken. 






~~~~~~~~

Inside the vehicle

The ability to determine a comfortable air temperature for two or more people is tricky.  It takes skill.  Moving the vents is almost always the best thing in these circumstances.  It’s bad if the car is too hot/cold for all.  In this case, all vents were on me.  I was in heaven. 


~~~~~~~~
Radio and music.  

Being where we are we can tap into the local stations.  What happens though when we are out of range? This is where Playlists come in.  Prior to hand held devices, which play whatever you have stored in them, there were 8Tracks, Cassettes and Compact Discs.  All of which were based on one band.  Luckily the Playlist is usually a unique or eclectic mix of songs, podcasts, comedy or whatever.  So, whomever is in charge of the music needs to be attentive to others’ likes/dislikes.




~~~~~~~~
Hotels.  

When booking a hotel ahead of time that is part of a national chain, be certain to notice which one you chose.  Why there are two Red Roof Hotels within two miles of each other is beyond me.  That situation is just begging for customer chaos.  Threatening the desk clerk of the hotel you thought you booked, but didn’t, is unacceptable.  You have to laugh off the confusion and pray that the one you didn’t book has availability and the one you accidentally booked (up the road a bit) is flexible with canceling.  Otherwise driving those two miles, after finding out about the mix up, can be very uncomfortable. (I think Best Westerns do it too -have more than one in a small town.) 









~~~~~~~~

What to bring.  

Well it was just an overnight visit so I kept it simple.  At least that’s what I thought I did.  I had my paperwork, meds, purse, pillow, top and skivvies.  No problem.  My husband asked if I had everything (my travel bag was lighter than usual).  One bag packing…  that was my goal.  He seemed skeptical.  


I was proud of myself… until approximately 90 minutes into the three hour drive.  Now, when the driver is on the road with comfortable atmosphere and the passenger gasps and starts looking around the car and bag packed next to him; he goes on full alert.  What did he miss???? An animal in the ditch?  A speed trap by local law enforcement?  Wrong direction?  (These are just the things I assume he was trying to figure out…  ). 

I had to admit (out loud) that I forgot a ton of stuff and he rolled his eyes.


When we stopped at the gas station within ten minutes, I was so relieved.  He was too, but in a totally different way.  

I had forgotten to pack deodorant, hair spray, pajamas, book, flat iron, shampoo, lotion, lip gloss and mascara.  Good ol’ gas station store is going to save me.  Well I got the deodorant, hairspray and lotion at least.  I even got him a lottery ticket and a box of his favorite candy.  (He didn’t share any of his candy with me.  Not one bit.  Hmph.). 
~~~~~~~~~~
So bring it all.  

Don’t try to stuff your personal maintenance necessities into one bag.  If you need two, take two.  There is no shame in needing tools when being presentable.  My husband was muttering “I thought it was too easy.  You with one bag… should have known.  Ha!”

~~~~~~~~

Do not poke the bear.  

I was bored.  We still had to go back home.  Another three – four hours in the car within twelve hours.  I was getting car sick and thought that if I could focus on something else, my gag reflex would settle down.  I swear my husband can read my mind.  Out of the side of his mouth without even looking at me, he said, “Do not even think I will put up with your need to entertain yourself at my expense.  I will pull over and leave you wherever you land.” 


Bummer.  I suppose a dud lottery ticket and box of candy only goes so far.

Nap time.
~~~~~~~~

This past week put over 800 miles on my Explorer with my husband at the helm.  The different appointments were all over the state from Ann Arbor to Hale with stops along the way.  He got us everywhere safely and didn’t leave me anywhere (bonus*).  

I count my blessings💫 at times like these.  We have a reliable vehicle, money for gas/hotel/food, and each other.  Sometimes we talk, sometimes we don’t.  We are comfortable together and have perhaps learned something new about each other before the day is done.  💞

✨Blessed indeed.✨
 

Acceptance, Angels, Attitude, Autoimmune diseases, Awkward, Bills, bills, bills, Books, Calculating, Candy, Captain Obvious, Car, Cheetos, Cleanliness, Click, Coke, College, Control, Cost, Crap!, Cry, Cups, Empty, Fate, Food, Fur-ever, Glass, Glimmer, Growth, Hashimotos, Husband, Hypothyroidism, Judge & Jury, Learning, Life, Life changes, Light, Logic, Long Distance, Love, Magic, Magnifying, Manager, Marriage, Me, Medicinal Metaphor, Mess, Minimal, MiniMart, Mirrors, Mocha, Moon, Morel mushrooms, Moving On, Mutt, My bad!, Nap, NASCAR 🏎, Naturalist, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Paid, Paranoid?, Parents, Past, Pepsi, Perfect Pair of Jeans, Pets, Pinkdom, Play nice, Playlist, Present, Purses, Quirk, Rationale, Relentless, Respect, Robin Williams, Rose, SALE /not sale, Scorpio, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Sisters, Skeleton, Skull, Snapple, Sneaky, Socks, Soul, Sun, Sunflower seeds, Sunrises, Sunsets, Superstition, Sweat 💦, Telepathy, Tradition!, Trees, Two Sides, Warmth, Windows, Wow, Writing

🕶 Summer 2017 👒

The skies are blue with white clouds, the wind is in the tops of the trees, and the scent of freshly mowed grass floats through the air.


I can be found outside to absorb Vitamin D more often.  I often go for drives in my 1999 Mazda Miata (top down, radio up.) singing my heart out.  I can enjoy the scenery when I take my dogs on walks.  I could go for bike rides with my husband.  I could follow through with plans or have a summer job for extra money.  But I’m not doing any of these things.  I can hope that all of this will play out next summer or the summer after that.  I will be ok, just not today.


I am spending this summer filling out forms.  Forms?  Yes, forms.  Being in my condition, I have a lot to “prove” to people, I guess.  I have forms for Student Loans, Social Security, Insurance Companies, Appointments to keep from each groups’ Independent Medical Reviews.  My years worth of forms is not helping to remove my carbon footprint.

So if you get the chance to capture some Vitamin D, walk your dog, drive your convertible and go for bike/ horse rides, do it.   Do it for everyone who can’t, right now.  Enjoy the outside and stay “form-free”.  Don’t pick up a writing utensil or hide behind a screen of any sort.  Mind your manners.  Eat full-fat ice cream … on a WAFFLE CONE! 

Most of all… 

Enjoy the Summer of 2017. 👒

26 letters, Acceptance, Agree to disagree, Angels, Attitude, Autoimmune diseases, Awkward, Bai, Bare, Beach Glass, Bills, bills, bills, Black, Books, Brat, Calculating, Candy, Captain Obvious, Car, Cheetos, Cleanliness, Click, Coke, College, Come to Jesus, Control, Cost, Crap!, Cry, Cups, Darwinist, Dean Koontz, Death, Diets, Education, Empty, Fate, Food, Football 🏈, Fur-ever, Future, Galileo, Gas Card, Gene Wilder, George Carlin, Glass, Glimmer, Hashimotos, Hat, Hot! Hot! Hot!, Husband, Hypothyroidism, I miss him, Idiosyncrasy, Judge & Jury, Kitten, Learning, Libra, Life, Life changes, Light, Lion, Literary Devices, Logic, Long Distance, Love, Magic, Magnifying, Manager, Marriage, Me, Medicinal Metaphor, Mess, Minimal, MiniMart, Mirrors, Mocha, Mom, Moon, Morel mushrooms, Moving On, Mutt, My bad!, Nap, NASCAR 🏎, Naturalist, Noise Canceling Headphones, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Overheated, Paid, Paranoid?, Parents, Past, Pepsi, Perfect Pair of Jeans, Pets, Pinkdom, Play nice, Playlist, Present, Purses, Quirk, Rationale, Relentless, Respect, Robin Williams, Room 406, Rose, SALE /not sale, Scorpio, Scott Stabille, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Sisters, Skeleton, Skull, Snapple, Sneaky, Snow, Socks, Soul, Sun, Sunflower seeds, Sunrises, Sunsets, Superstition, Sweat 💦, Teaching, Tears 😭, Telepathy, Tradition!, Trees, Two Sides, Type A, Type B, Unconditional, Veterinarian, Warmth, White, Windows, Wow, Writing

Planning, Hoping & Fumes

I think that I have a friend or two who genuinely care about me and my illnesses.  I believe that I have some acquaintances who would be certain to talk to me if we were in the same place, coincidently.


Thanks to Pastor Trisha Peach, blog peacht, via Hypothyroid Mom, I caught a few of her comments to be very true for me, currently.

Like this… “It makes planning nearly impossible. Many humans take for granted that they will wake up feeling “normal”, go to work, go see friends, go to their child’s sports game – same as always. 🌅👩🏻‍🏫👩🏼‍⚕️👨🏼‍💻👩🏻‍🏫👩‍🎤👮🏻👯‍♂️

For someone battling a chronic illness, you just don’t know. Instead of “planning”, it’s more like “hoping”. You “hope” you wake up feeling ok, you “hope” you can make it through work, you “hope” you can make it through your child’s play…..and each event takes its toll on your energy and health.


You cannot predict the day before how you will feel. So the world makes plans and prepares for events and you…..”hope” to be a part of them.”

She goes on to write,  “It is not because you no longer care or because the event is not important to you or the person is not important to you. You are missing out because your body has given out.

In fact, your body may be 4 or 5 events PAST too many by the time you just give out. It’s like driving a car that is running out of gas….you lasted on fumes, but finally despite all your efforts, the fumes have run out. The gas pedal is all the way to the floor, but she’s not going any further.”


My doctor had requested some blood work from me…, which, upon return, explained a plethora of my health problems. She was speaking another language (Greek? Latin? Dr. Speak?), regardless I needed Google. And here I am. 🌎.

Meghan O’Rourke has an essay called “I had Autoimmune Disease and then it had me.”   It was printed in The New Yorker Magazine, Aug. 26, 2013.  It came up in a Google Search for Hypothyroidism.  She was speaking my language.


So, for my friends, I hope to keep our plans but I need to be full; not on fumes.

💩. I don’t even like me when I’m on fumes.  👺

"The Ron Y Chromosome Nothing Box", 26 letters, Acceptance, Agree to disagree, Air Conditioner, Angels, Attitude, Autoimmune diseases, Awkward, Bare, Bills, bills, bills, Books, Brat, Calculating, Candy, Captain Obvious, Car, Cleanliness, Click, College, Come to Jesus, Control, Cost, Crap!, Cry, Cups, Darwinist, Death, Diets, Education, Empty, Fate, Food, Fur-ever, Future, Glass, Glimmer, Growth, Guns, Hashimotos, Hat, Hot! Hot! Hot!, Husband, Hypothyroidism, I miss him, Idiosyncrasy, Judge & Jury, Learning, Life, Life changes, Light, Logic, Long Distance, Love, Magic, Magnifying, Manager, Marriage, Me, Mess, Minimal, Mirrors, Mocha, Mom, Moon, Moving On, Mutt, My bad!, Nap, Not worth the headache, Nothing, Oops!, Organized, Overheated, Paid, Paranoid?, Parents, Past, Perfect Pair of Jeans, Pets, Play nice, Playlist, Present, Purses, Quirk, Rationale, Relentless, Respect, Rose, Scorpio, Scrutiny, Senses, Shattered, Silence, Sisters, Sneaky, Socks, Soul, Sun, Sunrises, Sunsets, Superstition, Sweat 💦, Teaching, Tears 😭, Telepathy, Tradition!, Trees, Two Sides, Unconditional, Warmth, Wow, Writing

Bariatric surgery

I experienced Roux-en-Y Gastric Bypass through removal of a portion of the stomach (sleeve gastrectomy or biliopancreatic diversion with duodenal switch) or by resecting and re-routing the small intestine to a small stomach pouch. 

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bariatric_surgery

I needed to be smaller than I was.  I had a great job, my own apartment, a strong family, a very nice Infinity QX4.  Life was grand, until I opened  my mouth to eat.  You see, in 2000, I was diagnosed as being morbidly obese.  I think that my BMI was in the 40’s.

My last year of undergrad was interesting.  I had my first real relationship, student teaching and no cash.  So I ate the cheap food from gas stations, dollar stores, and CostCo.  Bulk was definitely the way to go.  By the year 2000, I was going to end up with diabetes and heart disease.  

The gossip magazine’s were all doting on Carney Wilson of Wilson Philips.  She had an “Easy surgery and the fat just melted off of her”. No pills, drinks, fad diets or exercise programs ever again.   Hey I can handle that!

I got the surgery in October of 2001 -insurance companies are just so easygoing (*Sarcasm).  I laid on my dad’s couch for two weeks and followed the new diets prescribed by my surgeon.  (Clear liquid, regular liquids, soft solids, and then in 6 months normal food, just in very small amounts.  My stomach was now the size of an egg.  The pounds were indeed melting off.  I ended up losing 150 lbs in less than a year.  


The fact that I loved smoothies and coffee;  the ideal weight loss was fairly easy to maintain.  I would drink Protein shakes from the local GNC, drank the Jamba Juice’s “Mocha Moo’s” with extra protein powder, and Starbucks Caramel Macchiato.  I never bothered with cooking.  My idea of cooking was making a pb&j (if I really had to).  I took my dog for walks, farther and farther as weeks went by.  

I started going to “clubs” within the very end of my first year.  It didn’t matter which génère the music was. I just wanted to dance and feel the rhythm of it all.   I felt alive.

After the six months, I had a calzone (black olive, mushrooms, ham, and extra cheese).  Mmmm.  It was really good.  I needed a whole week to finish one… but I didn’t care.  Dancing on the weekends would burn off the calzone calories.   

I moved out of my home state and started a new life with my (then) boyfriend, (now) husband, in a new state 2003.  Alas, as I have mentioned in other posts, my new “home” was missing out on Jamba Juice chain stores and Starbucks (Coffee Shops).  I went through withdrawals.


I was definitely depressed (whenever I had a craving for a Mocha Moo) .  And since I’m an emotional eater, I ate.  I started with the homemade food at the school, where I taught.  That led to eating solid food everywhere!  I even got cooking lessons with, like, a real chef person!

It was getting harder and harder to maintain the ideal weight/ BMI. This means that I was gaining the weight back.  I honestly believed that the operation was to essentially banish the ability to gain weight.  Yet, here I sit, knowing it is possible.  Luckily I have plateaued at a number I can live with.  


I often wonder if the Bariatric Surgery has/ had something to do with the Hypothyroidism, Hashimoto’s, Adrenal Fatigue, etc. that I am going through now.

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Pickled!

I am really weird about food. Onion slices are ALWAYS next to Tomato slices in restaurants.  The Onions ruin everything. It is so frustrating!  I have felt the same way about pickles, jalapenos, peppers, etc. 

Given that I am from Arizona, I don’t know why or how this happened -Mexican food was, well, awful -in my opinion.  I loved the fresh chips and a very plain Chicken Chimichanga.  But nothing could be on or near my plate.  That made it a dry rectangle on a dessert plate.  It’s supposed to be covered in a “Sauce” and Salsa with rice and beans as well as some little salad (onions included).   I was the only person in the world of the Southwest who preferred Jamba Juice, Starbucks and mall food to honest-to-goodness real Mexican food..
So, moving to Michigan was a great thing for me. Potatoes, Berries, Steaks, Soups, great pizzas, Farmers Markets, oh my! Although I’m not a fan of the pickled eggs, bologna and of course, pickles.


I steered clear of pickled things. However, I was devastated to find out that my Jamba Juice wasn’t here in Michigan. Starbucks is two hours south of my home. 

I went through Jamba, Mall and Starbucks withdrawal. I was miserable to be around. My husband took me to the “Mall” north of the house and I cried. It wasn’t a mall! It hade three or five shops and no food.  


Maybe Arizona wasn’t so bad after all. While everyone else was burning their taste buds, I had “Mocha Moo’s” with extra protein powder. Or I would go to the real mall for Panda Express.

What was I going to do here? Mashed potatoes come to mama!

Growing up, I wouldn’t eat a pickle. Dill, sweet, relish, whatever else was up to my co-lunch mate. My sister would get them off my McDonald’s burgers and pretty much everything else that had a pickle served was fair game. 

I went to a pot luck luncheon recently and someone had made/brought these weird looking ham wraps of cream cheese and a dill spear. After much coercion from my friends, i said that I would try one.  

I. LOVE. THEM. 

Then all of a sudden I started to crave dill pickle spears. ?!

I mean really crave. I still don’t know what happened. I hated anything pickled and Mexican food; and then all of a sudden I’m eating Dill Pickles daily. At least they aren’t expensive.  What’s going to happen next?  Peppers on my pizza?
~~~~
My husband and I attended the MSU presentation (we owned a pet store and the presentation was a customer service reminder) of “Give ’em the pickle!” 

I was entranced. I found the website which the presenters got their information. Little did I know that there is a link between pickles and customer service.   WHAT?!

Example:
“The idea of giving pickles away comes from a letter I received from a disappointed customer who was visiting the first store we opened.” (Bob Ferrell)


“The pickle philosophy has evolved from there as it’s been put into practice at various businesses. It may be about going the extra mile to make customers happy or putting your own personal stamp on customer service that sets you apart from your competition.  (And I just gave it away.)

At my favorite tire store they literally run to greet me when I step out of my car in the parking lot. I’ve met garbage collectors who stop to start lawn mowers and coffee baristas who add a heart or other designs in the latte foam. Those are all pickles. What are yours?”  

(http://www.giveemthepickle.com/pickle_principle.htm)

It may seem like an odd metaphor for customer service. I feel bad about not recognizing the intentional customer service.

Weird. Right? Now I understand why pickles are served with entrées.

I don’t know what triggered my love for dill pickles. I am a fan.

I don’t believe that I will ever love onions, nor will I order something with the potential of having touched an onion. Ironically, everyone in my family loves onions; as well as my husband. (*sigh*)

By the way, I’m not pregnant. I simply want to know why I love the stupid pickle -all of a sudden.  Is it a body mineral thing?  Potassium?  Vinegar?  Brine? 

Maybe my taste buds are changing as I age.  What a pickle!

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Everybody is Dealing with Something -even if they aren’t “The Sick One”.

(Edited to reflect the life that my husband and I are currently experiencing.)

 

For me, hypothyroidism has been a cruel illness to live with, especially with all its horrible symptoms. Hypothyroidism can be hard on a marriage.

However, if you add divorce and/or maybe job loss to that, it makes it even worse – I have met a lot of people in that situation.

From the Husband’s Point-of-View:


And there is no doubt that hypothyroidism can be hard on a marriage. As a husband, you will probably hear about this illness a lot because it affects all aspects of your life and that of your wife. 
Besides, you might already be a little tired of listening to her complaints, not to mention that it might not always be interesting talking about the disease.
But don’t give up just yet, as there is hope if and when she gets the right treatment.
Let me describe some of my experiences in living with a thyroid patient.
She was sick for years before she was diagnosed.  She was the “hypochondriac of her family”, at least that’s what she was told.
As years went by, more and more symptoms became known. Not only did she gain weight, she was also sleeping a lot. 
But at the time, I didn’t know that she was actually ill – I just thought it was all part and parcel of getting older.
But she, herself, was convinced that something was wrong with her. Finally, she was diagnosed with hypothyroidism and was told that she needed medicine for the rest of her life, that she would feel well again, and that her symptoms would eventually disappear. Sadly they did not.
I didn’t really realize she was sick – I was busy.
Sure, I knew she was diagnosed and prescribed a pill -sick. But I also knew that since she was on medication, she should be alright, and so I stayed busy.
I was too busy and caught up with trying to manage both my job and almost all the housework at home like doing the dishes, preparing dinner, doing the laundry, cleaning, – all at the same time. I was too busy to really be conscious of my wife’s illness.
😴 She was sleeping all day
Of course, when I had the time I sometimes wondered why my wife was always sleeping when she came home from work. Sometimes she would sleep until the next day when she had to go to work again. 

I wondered why she suddenly seemed to have problems with her employer**– she used to be a highly valued employee who was entrusted with a lot of responsibility. She used to argue with her Boss when he tried to interfere with her work – and more often than not she’d get her way. But suddenly, all her spirit was gone.

🤔 She forgot everything
I used to wonder why she kept forgetting everything – all the time: purse, credit card, cell phone, shopping list, where she was, and where she was going. 

She gained weight, even though she was always following a serious diet. I couldn’t understand why. 
However, I did not really think much of it. Maybe it was only natural. It didn’t matter to me.  I was warned about Menopause. For all I knew, this could be Menopause.

😷 She was seeing doctors all the time.
In all this, she saw her doctor quite often and later some endocrinologist – I honestly don’t remember the details. She would often complain to me about her weight gain and about her troubles with getting back in shape. She could hardly walk, even up short stairs, without taking a break to breathe.
I listened but I didn’t really quite understand. And of course, sometimes I got a little tired of talking about the disease.  I just hoped the doctors would help her. However, they kept leaving the physical office or profession altogether, thus a lot of time was spent on “new” lab work, or another referral.  And life went on – daily life that is.
🤗 I got my wife back!  Or so I assumed.
One day she told me she had found a new doctor (again!), and that she wanted to give it another try. He apparently gave her another kind of medicine – I didn’t really understand, at the time, the difference.  I was busy.

🤓. Finally I understood
It was when I also came to realize how terrible she had been treated by her doctors, and how little, (people including me and many a doctor), had understood hypothyroidism.

🐘. I became her memory 

  • *But she still needs help and support. Hypothyroidism is chronic and if she forgets her medication, even for only a few days, the symptoms would be back. She has to take her pills three times a day.
  • *In the beginning she hated when I looked inside her pill-box and told her if she had forgotten to take some of the pills. But she learned to accept it – because if she forgets her pills – the symptoms come back and she becomes forgetful and therefore forgets to take even more pills.
  • *So I have become her memory. Every morning I ask her if she took her first pills and check that she remembers all the pills on the day before. As long as she takes her medication,  we hope it gets absorbed and I get my wife back.

What can you do?
How can you help your hypothyroid wife (or husband, relative)?

****That really depends on whether s/he is well treated or still struggling just to get diagnosed or find the right dose or treatment.  We are still struggling with different doses and triggers (food, allergies, spices, scents, texture and cravings) that knock her out.  🤷🏼‍♀️
Brande is still struggling with the symptoms and/or finding the right treatment, there are many things that have be recommended to me:

  • *Most importantly: remember that you love each other. Remember how you first fell in love. Help each other to recall those precious moments. You will need those to get through the difficult times ahead.
  • *Accept and understand her situation. It might be helpful to read about other patients’ experiences. You will realize that other patients are in the same situation and that there is hope for a normal life again.
  • *Don’t expect too much from her in daily life. You probably have to take up most of the practical work in and around the house.
  • *Don’t let her see the doctor alone. A person suffering from hypothyroidism will often find it difficult to explain her symptoms. 
  • *Be there to support her and if necessary be her advocate. Help her get the proper treatment. And if need be, help her find another doctor.
  • *Remember, there is always hope. Given the right treatment, chances are your wife may recover and be herself again.
  • *Maybe she needs help with the medication. Doses sometimes have to be regulated and adjusted. 
  • Be aware of your wife’s condition – has she changed? 

You will probably be the first to notice. 

  • Is she getting tired and forgetful again? 
  • Maybe she needs a raise in dose – talk to the doctor. 
  • Or is she restless and anxious? Maybe the dose is too high – talk to the doctor.

🌏. Life can become normal again.
When your wife is well treated, she probably will not need that much support anymore on account of her illness, except for making sure that she does take her medication which you might need to remind her.

Also, she might need your help to explain her illness to other people. Hypothyroidism is a trivialized illness and very few know anything about the consequences and extent of the disease.
😐. Accept that hypothyroidism will be part of your lives.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

😳. For the full article and hyperlink to other helpful sources please refer to:
(Hypothyroidmom.com)

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Favorite Quotes…

  • “My desire is not to create mirrors into the souls of men. My desire is to discover any man in truth who can serve two masters and maintain a right to vote.”  ~Queen Elizabeth 👑
  • Tell them I’m through, “For the love of the game.”  -Kevin Costner ⚾️
  • “Let the heat come in, we can begin again. Don’t ever let it make you run, …” 

  • We can learn to view peace as a verb, not just a noun. It comes from within. ☯️
  • Peace matters, not just in this season, but in every season. It matters in our own lives, it matters to our neighbors, and it matters to the millions that share this earth with us.  -The Pope ☮️
  • I am pro peace. -Mother Teresa 💕
  • It doesn’t matter what’s out there. What matters is what’s in here (point to yourself) 💝
  • I like what she said about her breakup…..that when women love so completely, they just want that love to be returned or shown & felt in return. Men just don’t seem to get that. -Lady GaGa,  💞
  • “My heart is afraid that it will have to suffer,” the boy confides to the alchemist one night as they look up at a moonless night.  🌑

  • “Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself,” the alchemist replies. “And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second’s encounter with God and with eternity.” –Gail Hudson 💫
  • Hang in there, sweet girl.  You’re doing the right thing: you’re sticking with recovery, nourishing your body, and learning to love yourself.  Keep doing the right thing. One day at a time. One meal at a time.
  • I believe in you.  Did you know that?  Do you realize that I probably believe more in you, than you do.  You are wise beyond your years.  ~b. 
  • “Mistakes” is just another word for Experiences. There’s a lot of truth to the saying, “Some things are just not meant to be.” (Tim McGraw via music video Big & Rich).  🎼
  • I don’t eat full meals anymore. I take a few bites and I’m done. Once in awhile I realize that I cooked something but I lose interest and just won’t eat it. I read a book called “Why French Women don’t get fat.” It claimed that they only take three bites to feel full.  How big are those bites? ~b. 

  • I’ve had enough of danger
 and people on the streets
.  I’m looking out for angels
.  Just trying to find some peace
Now I think it’s time.  
That you let me know.  
So if you love me.  
Say you love me
.  But if you don’t, just let me go.  -George Michael  😇
  • Do I contradict myself? Very well, then, I contradict myself; I am large—I contain multitudes.― Walt Whitman. 🎄🌳🌲🌱🌿🍃